Where must I view it from? On the sad ending? Or on the clean slated beginning?
Today my is Group Leader's (GL) last day at work. He resigned over a month ago for still unknown reasons. I and my groupmates felt not only betrayed; we also felt less important to deserve this announcement, and in detail.
The first time I heard of this news was from my friend from another group. At first I was skeptical because it wasn't the first time that our GL filed his resignation. She also told me that a reorganization of groups would follow his resignation. I couldn't decide which was more dreadful: the reorganization or the fact that other groups were more aware of this truth than us.
Since I was deployed after three months of rigorous training, I've come to love whatever there was in our group. The imperfections, the lack of breaktime bondings, after work group activities, or the oddity of my GL. I despised him even before I got in his group. He was infamous for his behavior. He doesn't have that much friends but eventually we got along. Maybe because I pitied him due to the things that people say at his back. I learned how to belong, how to make the most out of our situation.
Our group dissolves after tomorrow. No more LV1V3G. I used to envy other groups for their ties of friendship that developed over the months. But it is only now that I understood how much I wanted our group to reach a certain form of unity. It hurts to see us go away, apart from each other.
It may be a sad ending, but the positive part is the tabula rasa. Our mistakes, shortcomings and unprofessionalism will be reset when we move to the other groups. It sounds good in theory, but in reality, it is another adjustment to make. I think I'm afraid of the expectations. I'm afraid of doing anything wrong. I'm afraid of losing the closeness to my groupmates that was starting to materialize. I'm afraid of being alone.
*
I remember when I was a college freshman, we had a drawing class. Our lesson for that day was Perspectives. Common perspectives include single point perspective and two point perspective.
The difference is the vanishing point, as the perspevtive names suggest. Vanishing point is like the point across the eye which denotes infinity. A vanishing point must be chosen correctly to show the whole perspective of a figure, because it will be a reference throughout the whole drawing. Seeing it wrong from a different vanishing point might result to an unidentifiable drawing, ergo, junk. All corners are projected to the vanishing point so it is important to choose it wisely.
*
I see this now as a two point perspective. It's just that, I need to choose wisely. I need to have a motivation to work harder. In as much as I already feel stressed in the job, I need to keep it. I've too many pledges and commitments that would need the money that I'm getting at work. I'm choosing wisely, so I'll hold on to the both of these perspectives.
Today my is Group Leader's (GL) last day at work. He resigned over a month ago for still unknown reasons. I and my groupmates felt not only betrayed; we also felt less important to deserve this announcement, and in detail.
The first time I heard of this news was from my friend from another group. At first I was skeptical because it wasn't the first time that our GL filed his resignation. She also told me that a reorganization of groups would follow his resignation. I couldn't decide which was more dreadful: the reorganization or the fact that other groups were more aware of this truth than us.
Since I was deployed after three months of rigorous training, I've come to love whatever there was in our group. The imperfections, the lack of breaktime bondings, after work group activities, or the oddity of my GL. I despised him even before I got in his group. He was infamous for his behavior. He doesn't have that much friends but eventually we got along. Maybe because I pitied him due to the things that people say at his back. I learned how to belong, how to make the most out of our situation.
Our group dissolves after tomorrow. No more LV1V3G. I used to envy other groups for their ties of friendship that developed over the months. But it is only now that I understood how much I wanted our group to reach a certain form of unity. It hurts to see us go away, apart from each other.
It may be a sad ending, but the positive part is the tabula rasa. Our mistakes, shortcomings and unprofessionalism will be reset when we move to the other groups. It sounds good in theory, but in reality, it is another adjustment to make. I think I'm afraid of the expectations. I'm afraid of doing anything wrong. I'm afraid of losing the closeness to my groupmates that was starting to materialize. I'm afraid of being alone.
*
I remember when I was a college freshman, we had a drawing class. Our lesson for that day was Perspectives. Common perspectives include single point perspective and two point perspective.
The difference is the vanishing point, as the perspevtive names suggest. Vanishing point is like the point across the eye which denotes infinity. A vanishing point must be chosen correctly to show the whole perspective of a figure, because it will be a reference throughout the whole drawing. Seeing it wrong from a different vanishing point might result to an unidentifiable drawing, ergo, junk. All corners are projected to the vanishing point so it is important to choose it wisely.
*
I see this now as a two point perspective. It's just that, I need to choose wisely. I need to have a motivation to work harder. In as much as I already feel stressed in the job, I need to keep it. I've too many pledges and commitments that would need the money that I'm getting at work. I'm choosing wisely, so I'll hold on to the both of these perspectives.
posted from Bloggeroid
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